My Story

Survive after Domestic Violence ImageMY STORY: The abuser [Badguy] seems like a charming, confident man’s man to most people. Before I moved in with him he was charismatic, kind, passionate towards me, used Christian lingo a lot, ‘mirroring’ the way I viewed life and felt about my family and my faith…little did I know how much of this was a ploy to get me. Remember if abusers didn’t appear ‘too good to be true’ in the beginning they never would have gotten us to begin with.

I fell in love with him, hard and fast.

I had been living with one foot in the Kingdom of the World and one foot in the Kingdom of God, doing things my own way and quenching God’s nudges instead of paying attention to them. So when Badguy pressured me for an early commitment of moving in (with two failed marriages behind me and never having lived with a man) I said yes.

The day I moved in with him it ALL changed.

Badguy did not start off by physically abusing me. He began with emotional and verbal abuse. He made comments about my looks and body to demean me. If I attempted to express emotion or feelings they were always wrong and his anger would rise. He said I was a freak, crazy, everything was in my head…I was the one causing all our problems. He constantly talked down to me like I was a child. He would threaten me if I asked questions, punch holes in the door if he didn’t like what I was talking about, threaten me with death when I refused to submit to his abusive ways.

In September 2010 the 1st assault occurred, I tried to leave but he ripped the keys from my hand and sprained my finger. In December 2010 he chest butted me (his usual MO) pinned me against the sink and wouldn’t let me go-I slapped his face, but he just slapped me back hard and drug me to the ground. This was followed by many more assaults; being pinned down, being bear hugged and tossed like a rag doll, hitting me with objects. One of the last attacks he broke my arm when I tried to leave. Badguy attacked me three more times after breaking my arm; the last attack he held me up against a wall saying he loves me and then bit my other arm that wasn’t in the cast. I kept asking for the Lord to get me out of there…He made a way for me…two days after his last attack I escaped.

I escaped. I am healing. I have a long way to go but I WILL get there as I fully lean on God and His abundant mercy.

[See My Story: Prequel]