Valentine’s Day Flashback

broken_heartToday I had a flashback…not about Badguy but rather my son’s dad. We were married for just over a year, I had my little man who was 3 months old at the time & it was valentines day 07. I made my ex a lovely card with a picture of him and our son on it thanking him for being a good daddy. We were strapped for cash so I wasn’t expecting much, maybe just a sentiment on a card…after all I just gave birth to his son and devoted myself to our family :). After I gave him the V-day card, he said he chose not to give me one…no apologies only that he didn’t think I was happy with him (I wasn’t…see below). So he chose to punish me.

This actually came back to me pretty hard today and brought a tear to my eye, with which I then praised God for that hurt, that moment and for the ex…that He has brought me out of it and that it happened to teach me what I settled for.

The ex didn’t want to be part of a family: didn’t move in a home with me till 6 months after we were married AND still kept his beach apartment (though he had no money), made me pay for all my bills and groceries (if it was specifically for my daughter or myself) separately, was on singles sites (I found out when my son was 6 months old), tore me down verbally all the time, put my looks, my clothes, my jewelry, my intelligence, my ‘being’ down … Looking back I understand now how mentally and verbally abusive he was.

Bless my son’s dad with Your salvation, Your love overwhelming his being that he may know YOU and be enraptured by your grace and mercy.